Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Everything I Know About Motherhood

I've been thinking about the lessons I've learned from being a mom. I've been a step-mom for over 8 years, and a mom for 7. I pretty much am an expert. So, here's what I know, so that you can be an expert, too.

  1. Motherhood is not like baking cookies. You can raise your kids all the same, and they will each turn out different.
  2. If you serve snack items as a meal, your children will not count it as a meal. Same goes for cereal. They will cry that they forgot to have lunch or dinner, even though they ate a lot at those same hours.
  3. Don't start anything with a baby that you aren't willing to continue for the next 5 years. Read your baby 5 stories a night followed by rocking them to sleep? Have fun doing it every night for the next 1,820 nights.
  4. If you mix veggies into their favorite foods, they will still eat those foods and still really like them. If you tell them veggies are in them, they will never touch that food again.
  5. Silly voices can cure a variety of ills. As can Diet Coke. Diet Coke is the most magical medicine ever invented. From hurt feelings to hurt knees, it's a miracle drink.
  6. It's not a break if your kids are already asleep. It is a break if someone takes them during their most waking, and therefore crazy, hours.
  7. A sense of humor is a must. Being beautiful helps, too.

That's pretty much it. 7 things. One for each year. Hope you learned something today.

5 comments:

Leslie said...

I loved that Jana! Thanks for your wisdom, you're amazing!

Jewel said...

ROFl... so glad you are beautiful!

Jackie said...

Love it Jana!

Mama Pea said...

Too funny. In my house, Diet Coke cures a lot of ills, too. haha.

How about this one: Don't say anything to your kids unless you're willing to have it parroted back to you. And it will be really painful when you hear your words, in your tone, said back to you from your kid. I can't get over how painful that is! haha

Linz said...

THat was absolutely hilarious! I'm going to have to keep that cookie analogy in mind when the differences between my kids boggle my mind! Please do another post if your list grows...I love it!